Charlie's Pizza & Cafe is this great little place two blocks from where Matt and I live in Boston. They also happen to be on the way to and from our T stop -- which means they are in prime location for those of us who do not want to cook at night after a long day of work/class or both. I never stop in -- because I never think of it until I actually get home -- but luckily you can order on the Internet -- ooh technology.
The other night Matt and I ordered from Charlie's, as we often do, because it's cheap, and yummy, and does not require us using our kitchen. We both ordered their meatball sub sandwich which is delicious. The new menu online had a "sauce" drop down menu -- of which buffalo, bbq, honey mustard, bleu cheese, and "no sauce" were all choices. We chose the "no sauce" because marinara was not an option. FOOLISHLY we assumed that by choosing "no sauce" we were telling the restaurant to keep the original marinara sauce as the option.
After all -- who has ever heard of a meatball sub without the marinara/homemade/whatever sauce...right?!?!
Well -- sure enough we both open our subs: there's the bread, the meatballs, the melted cheese...and no sauce. Granted this is what we chose on the sauce menu -- but there wasn't an option for marinara! Needless to say, our lesson was learned.
Tonight I've come home from work late and am again in no mood to cook. I automatically bring up Charlie's menu on the online ordering site -- and automatically want a meatball sub. I double check the sauce menu -- still no marinara. So I've kindly asked in the "additional instructions" box to make sure they put marinara sauce on the sub. Problem solved, well, ask me again when the food is actually delivered.
This brings me to my thought for today: Sometimes I feel as if I'm given these little practical jokes from "the cosmos" and my reaction to the joke, and what happens as a result, is the punchline for the joker.
Let me be clear, and some of you may not agree with this, but I truly believe "the cosmos" are actually my loved ones who have already passed and are now my guardian angels looking over me.
I do not consider myself to be religious in the sense that I go to church every week, read the Bible every day - or even every week, and I certainly don't pray as often as others. I do, however, feel that I am extremely spiritual. I believe in God, I believe that there is eternal life for those who have finished their time here with us, and I believe that there are connections we still have to the loved ones we've lost, and that these connections manifest themselves in different ways, at different times, and all for very specific reasons.
For example, soon after my Mom died in 2001, I began noticing that streetlights would go out as I was driving up to them, and then go on immediately after I passed and could see it in my rear view window. Only one light. No flicker or other signal that the bulb is bad, or that the electrical connection is faulty. A definite wink of sorts. I don't know how to explain it, but something told me it was my Mom saying hello. It doesn't happen very often, and I can't pinpoint any correlation between what's happening in my world that would make her want to let me know she's there. The kicker for me was when this began happening in broad daylight -- one solitary street light would either be on, and go off, OR it would go ON as I was driving up and then go back off once I passed.
So believe me or don't believe me, but I know there are signals that my loved ones send me letting me know they are there and watching over me.
However I know my family, those alive and not-- and I know how much we all love to laugh, tell jokes, make someone smile, and just ease some one's stress or tension if possible. I know that everyone in my family has experienced profound loss and pain, so we all automatically choose to make someone smile, or laugh, or feel comforted...whenever possible.
This brings me to the practical jokes...like the sauce-less meatball sub. I feel that these little jokes come from my loved ones who have died...at times when I am stressed, or sad, or unsettled in any way. These little jokes are meant to make me laugh, to let out some of that stressful energy, but also to remind me of those things in life that truly matter. The sauce-less sub came at a time when work was escalating quickly into a super-stressful place. It's all for very positive reasons -this is a super busy time in my department, hell in the whole theatre, and a lot of our programs are launching their 2009-2010 season: and this is all GREAT NEWS! But there is so much on every one's plate right now, in the entire theatre, AND our first show of the season opens NEXT WEEK which is just insane. No matter how the cookie crumbles, whether positive or negative, the stress is still there, and still affects me physically/mentally/etc. So I actually smile when I realize these moments are practical jokes, and it allows me to release the stress.
My uncle made my sister and I these beautiful mantle clocks for Christmas last year (2008). It is stunning and old fashioned (you need to wind it once a week to keep time, it chimes for each quarter hour), and means so much to me because of the care, love, and thought that went into it. It's one of those clocks that will fit in any room, any decor, and will last for a lifetime.
Except that about 6 months ago it just stopped. No more chimes, no more ticking, no more time. I had done everything right, wound the clock once a week (it's advised to do it the same day/time each week to maintain the best consistency...like birth control...or something) and it still wouldn't run. I tried everything to get it running again...but for months it sat there silently NOT keeping time.
Until yesterday.
Matt was sweeping the living room -- where the clock lives -- and had to move the side table to get behind it. When he moved the table back to its position, the clock began to chime! I thought it was just because of the movement, and didn't expect it to continue.
After 4 hours of the clock keeping the wrong time (it was about 5 hours ahead), I decided to update it to the current time and see what happens, thinking it would stop as soon as I expected it to keep real time.
More than 24 hours later and the clock is still keeping time and chiming on time! Another moment I'm convinced was helped along probably by my aunt -- who knew that my uncle had made these clocks for my sister and I, and were just as excited for us to get them as my uncle was to give them.
I'm happy that my clock works, I'm happy things at work are busy and going well, and I'm especially happy to tell you that tonight's meatball sub has arrived, and there is indeed marinara sauce included.
It may be hard, it may make me sad, happy, angry, or otherwise, and it may throw me for a loop -- but overall my life is good, very very good. I miss my loved ones everyday, and think of them hundreds of times a day...but know they are with me, in my heart always, and remind me of this at the hardest times...all to keep the smile on my face.
No comments:
Post a Comment